In the terminal

Here I sit...and wait...

5 hours.

That's how long I must cower and wait.

Wait wait wait.

Not because of a layover. I must wait because my parents didn't want to rent the car for another day and had to return it at noon. So I got to the airport 5 hours early. If I could capitalize the 5 I would. Oh here we go...FIVE hours early. So I've watched one episode of Six Feet Under, listen to a black guy talk super loud on the phone and pace, told my boyfriend he doesn't love me, texted him back and said I know he does, looked at prices of my new business proposition--feathering people's hair, looked at business licenses, gone to the bathroom and eaten a philly cheesesteak (my favorite). I still have...two more hours. Fuck.

I've thought about hooking up with the guy sitting in front of me because he has to wait a long time too...at least I overheard his phone conversation. But he's not cute enough for it. You must be a certain cuteness to sleep with me or make out with me. Cept that guy named Rico. I was the cute one then. But that was back in the 00's maybe...2 years ago? I was going to visit one of my uncles. He gave me a hickey too. Fuck him.

There's a purple jewel on my luggage. Just saw it. Now I can't stop staring at it. Oh God I'm bored. GOD GOD GOD. I wish I could make invisible letters. Wouldn't that be cool? Or maybe I have already but you can't see it. Bwahhahahaha. Now your wondering.

Did you know, it's impossible to lick your elbow.

Go on, try.

I dare you.

Double dog dare you.

I bet you tried.

If you didn't fuck you too.

I have a lot of fuck you's on my mind today.

Maybe it's because my boyfriend doesn't love me.

Or maybe he does.

He says he does but how am I supposed to know he's telling the truth.

That's it! I can't trust anyone even though I say I trust you odds are I don't.

Trust is a hard thing for me.

But if he's really a great person then he'll realize that I didn't mean to say that he didn't love me.

I was just angry because it takes him 10+ minutes to respond to anything I say to him.

Do you realize just how aggravating that is? Like...seriously. If your talking to someone online it's just plain rude to take more then 3 minutes. Same if your texting someone.

Now I feel clingy.

Go away.

Leave me alone.

No one loves me yet everyone does.

Go fuck yourself.